Inferior Quotations

IQ: [VHS.] That Contadina® ad!!!

Dottie Hinson: Wisenheimer.

IQ: Mmm the birds chirpin’ before Carole King starts singin’.

Dottie Hinson: Kill ’im.

Carole King: Didn’we find the ecstasy.

Dottie Hinson: No high ones.

Kit Keller: I like the high ones.

Dottie Hinson: Too high.

IQ: Uh! When she doesn’t swing at that first pitch.

Dottie Hinson: All I said was Lay off the high ones.

Dottie Hinson: What idiot said thaat.

Dottie Hinson: But, an import’nt step.

Ernie Capadino: Oh it would bruise the hell out of mee.

Dottie Hinson: Yeah.. I feed ’em to the cows when they’re connnstipated.

Ernie Capadino: That’s the guy.

IQ: Is Harvey Bar real.

Dottie Hinson: Pull her leg for a while mine are long enough already.

Ernie Capadino: You can climb back under the cow.

Ernie Capadino: Hey no skin off my Ashtabula.

Dottie Hinson: Look I’m married, I’m happy, it’s what I want, let’s not confuse things.

Ma Keller: Keep your voice down; your father’s listenin’ to the radio.

Ernie Capadino: Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Y’know, if I had your job, I’d kill my self. Sit here an’ I’ll see if I can dig up a pistol.

Ernie Capadino: Did ya promise the cows ya’d write.

Dave Hooch: She’s got an eye like DiMa-ggio.

IQ: American-flag reflection on the train.

Ernie Capadino: It’s been a thin slice of heaven, g’bye.

IQ: Pickle tickle?. This guy..

Mae Mordabito: That’s it?

Mae Mordabito: You wish.

Doris Murphy: You do wish.

Doris Murphy: Yeah what’re you a genius heh heh heh heh heh..

Doris Murphy: She just grrabbed it.

Miss Maida Gillespie: Careers an’ higher education are leading to the masculinization of women with enormously dangerous consequences to the home, the children, and our country.

IQ: She died four months after the film was released.

Racine Coach Charlie Collins: Or are you on the cut list.

Ira Lowenstein: Uh-there is no smoking. There is also no drinking and no men. All of your social engagements will be cleared through your team chaperones. Plus! Each of you will have regular classes at Charm and Beauty school.

Doris Murphy: FO’-WHAT.

Ira Lowenstein: Every girl in this league is gonna be a lady.

Charm School Instructor: And, grracefully and granndly. Grracefully and granndly. Grracefully and granndly. Grracefully and granndly. Grracefully and granndly.

Charm School Instructor: And sip!. Down. Don’t slurp!. Sip. Dowwwn. Don’t slurp. Sip!. Dowwn. Don’t slurp. Sip!. Dowwn. Don’t slurp.

Charm School Instructor: Posture!. Heads up. Backs straight. And sit!. Right over left; legs always together; a lady reveals nothing.

IQ: A lot of night games, how cruel.

Walter Harvey: These are my in-laws. Hellooo?. They can’t hear nothin’. Enough socializing.

Walter Harvey: You’ve seen the error of your ways.

Jimmy Dugan: No I just can’t afford it. H-h-huh-huh-h-h-huh-huh-huah.

Walter Harvey: That’s funny to you. Your drinking is funny.

Walter Harvey: […] if you’d just woulda laid off the booze.

Walter Harvey: [Looks at pocket watch.] I gotta feed the fish.

IQ: Tom Hanks.

Mae Mordabito: Boy that was some good peein’.

Jimmy Dugan: Bull shit you can all kiss my ass ’at’s right kiss my big hairry athh..

Jimmy Dugan: Well any thing worth doin’ is worth doin’ right.

Ira Lowenstein: Yes in deed.

IQ: God he’s such a slob.

IQ: Oh I said that last time.

IQ: Slob.. [Looks at self.]

Lou Goose-a-telly: That’s it; I quit.

Miss Cuthbert: Oh please Mister Goose-a-telly.

Doris Murphy: Don’t use my bat use Marla’s it’s heavieh!

IQ: A man throws dirt in a woman’s face in this movie.

Dottie Hinson: Yeah I hope I have five just like ’im.

Jimmy Dugan: WHO’S LOU!!

Doctor: I wouldn’t wear those shoes again Miss Cuthbert.

Dottie Hinson: Kit, hey sorry we gotta go, c’mon.

IQ: American flag on the wall.

Doris Murphy: I knew it, you killed Miss Cuthbert.

Mae Mordabito: We’ll bury’er; I knowaguy; ckihhh! Hahaha!

Dottie Hinson: Hey is this all of you; Marla didn’t come?

Doris Murphy: She came.

Jimmy Dugan: Why would I wanna drink I’m a god damn peach.

Stadium Announcer: Boy did she smack that one right on the kisser. No wonder they call her All The Way Mae.

Jimmy Dugan: Super.

IQ: Stop thinkin’ with yer tits?

Shirley Baker: Gribb-ed.

Mae Mordabito: Grabbed.

Alice Gaspers: Bone yard.

??: Huh.

Alice Gaspers: Cemetery bone yard have t’cross your fingers or y’never get an other hit.

Mae Mordabito: Sound it out.

Shirley Baker: Kihhm..

Mae Mordabito: Kimono.

Shirley Baker: Kimo.

Mae Mordabito: Kimono.

Shirley Baker: Off. And. gr-gra-grabb-ed.

Mae Mordabito: Grabbed.

Shirley Baker: Her. muh-mih-mil, mil-milky, milky, whi, whiite, milky whiite.

Evelyn Gardner: Mae what are you giving her to read.

Mae Mordabito: Oh what diff’rence does it make she’s reading okay. That’s the import’nt thing now go away go shoo!. shoo!. Go ahead, Shirley you’re doin’ good.

Shirley Baker: Thanks Mae, okay. Milky. whiite. brrea… breasts.

Mae Mordabito: It gets really good, after that, look. Delivery boy walks in.

Doris Murphy: So long Chaa’lie.

Evelyn Gardner: W-well I-I’m a peach.

Jimmy Dugan: NOW YOU START USING YOUR HEAD!! THAT’S THAT LUMP! THAT’S THREE FEET ABOVE YOUR ASS!!!

Doris Murphy: A triple maybe a double would be nice.

Jimmy Dugan: Alright! God knows we have a game. It’s not like any of this helps believe me.

Mae Mordabito: What if at a key momen’ in the game, my-my uniform bursts open, an-an’ uh, oops my bosoms come flyin’ out, now that that might might draw a crowd right?.

Doris Murphy: You think there are men in this country that ain’t seen your bosoms.

Dottie Hinson: He’s assistant manager at the dairy. He’s gonna be manager some day he’s real smart.

Jimmy Dugan: Oh I get so useless so fast.

IQ: Does he drink a Coke[sic]® and like it, Tom Hanks?

IQ: I can’t tell if he likes the Coca-Cola® or thinks it’s bull’s shit.

Walter Harvey: I love these girls I don’t need ’em but I love ’em.

Ira Lowenstein: This is a product.!

IQ: Are those buttons mother of pearl.

Doris Murphy: Hey Mae. Mae ya dates heah.

Mae Mordabito: How do I look?.

Doris Murphy: Where’d you get that dress??

Mae Mordabito: I borrowed it.

Doris Murphy: It don’t fit ya Mae it’s too tight.

Mae Mordabito: I don’t plan on wearin’ it that long.

Doris Murphy: Aohh.! I don’know why you get dressed at all.!

Dottie Hinson: Blow it out your rear end.

Dottie Hinson: I didn’even wanna be here.

Helen Haley: Has any one seen my new red h-hat?

Dottie Hinson: Oh piss on your hat.!

Jimmy Dugan: Already dressed.

Jimmy Dugan: I was in the toilet readin’ my contract […]

IQ: What a poor way to present that [death announcement telegram].

Dottie Hinson: Can we just hold each other for the rest of our lives.

Bob Hinson: That’s my plan.

Alice Gaspers: Jimmy don’t yell at me before a game it’s bad luck.

Autograph Kid #1: Wowww. Avoid the clap Jimmy Dugan.

Autograph Kid #2: Wowww.

Jimmy Dugan: I-I gave away five years.. at the end of my career to drinking. Five years. And now there isn’t any thing I wouldn’t give to get back.. any one day of it.

Dottie Hinson: Well, we’re diff’rent.

IQ: A hundred babies?

Mister Murphy: I’m gonna surprise’r; after the game I’m gonna take’r out for a steak dinner ha ha ha ha ha!.

Jimmy Dugan: You know who she is she kept callin’ your name.

Dottie Hinson: Hey Jimmy!. Y’look like shit; don’t you ever shave.

[Racine Catcher]: Very cute; thanks.

IQ: Dang that glare.!

IQ: [When the ball rolls out of her hand. First viewing] WHAT!! NO!! UGH!!

IQ: [When the ball rolls out of her hand. ~Tenth viewing.] Hahahahaha!!

Doris Murphy: I’m so depressed I could eat a cow.

Dottie Hinson: Hi how much are these?

Concession Stand Man: Oh help your self.

Dottie Hinson: You wanted it more than me.

Dottie Hinson: Miss it!. […] Think I’m gonna miss that?.